Right before Easter, I travelled on American Airlines. On the plane, I met a young flight attendant, named Kaitlin, who was wearing goofy bunny earrings. Of course I had to comment on them—they were hilarious. She told me that she loved these earrings and was so happy that she could wear them since Easter was the next day. I asked her why she couldn't wear these on another day. She said, "I guess I can, it must be because I'm somehow putting limits on myself."
Way too often, we get in our own way thinking that we can't do something. In doing so, we are limiting ourselves.
Here is a tangent: I usually get very sleepy in the car. I have had this issue since birth, which is wonderful when I am the passenger (zzzzzzz) but awful when I am the driver, going long distances. Driving after a meal? Forget about it. It is embarrassing what I need to do, to keep myself awake. I listen to loud music and SCREAM the lyrics; I blast the air conditioning while keeping the windows open; I slap myself hard on my thighs. (We will not discuss the welts I have given myself.)
Years ago, when my kids were planning college visits, I was so full of dread knowing that these college trips meant a ton of driving. I knew I would never be able to do it—I would never be able to stay awake. I was moaning about this to a friend when she cut me off and said, "STOP IT! Why are you putting limitations on yourself? You can do this, and you will." No surprise, she was right. Since then, when I find myself setting limits, I catch myself, tell myself to CUT IT OUT, and move on. It works!
Pay attention to see if this happens to you. If so, pause and be curious about what's going on. Does this require simply a stern, "CUT IT OUT", or do you have to dig deeper to uncover a more problematic underlying issue? Either way, I know, for certain, that any self-limiting talk is not helpful and I'm sure it is not serving you well.
And just for the record, I made Kaitlin, that adorable, young flight attendant, promise me that she would wear those goofy earrings another time during the year that had nothing to do with Easter. She said she would.
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