Dave Barry's Blog

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• THAT IS A *LOT* OF CLAMSHELL BRAS
• NEED A SPECIAL GIFT FOR A SPECIAL LADY?
• ADVISORY
• THE SCIENCE IS SETTLED
• THE ESSENTIALS
• NEW YORK HAS OPOSSUMS?
• WE'RE GUESSING HE'S SINGLE
• WE'RE SOLD
• THIS IS WHY WE ALWAYS STOP AFTER THAT FIFTH LITER
• SOUNDS FESTIVE!
• WHAT IS THE DOCTOR DOING IN THEIR SHOWER?
• WHY YOUR PIZZA HAS ONLY SEVEN SLICES
• LOUISIANA ART UPDATE
• NO MO HOJO
• UPDATE ON WORLDWIDE TOILET-SNAKE EPIDEMIC THAT CONTINUES TO BE IGNORED BY THE SO-CALLED 'MAINSTREAM MEDIA'
• WE THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
• DO NOT MESS WITH THEM
• MEANWHILE IN FLATHEAD COUNTY
• CANADA: A NATION WITH A LOT OF SPARE TIME ON ITS HANDS
• YES, THAT'LL DO IT

THAT IS A *LOT* OF CLAMSHELL BRAS Posted: 02 Jun 2022 09:56 AM PDT Nearly 400 Brits break world record for most mermaids ever in one place (Thanks to John Lobert)

NEED A SPECIAL GIFT FOR A SPECIAL LADY? Posted: 02 Jun 2022 09:54 AM PDT This is probably not it. (Thanks to John Lobert)

ADVISORY Posted: 02 Jun 2022 07:39 AM PDT Not one of the items posted on the blog today, or for that matter yesterday, was sent in by nursecindy.

THE SCIENCE IS SETTLED Posted: 02 Jun 2022 07:12 AM PDT Older boozers recover FASTER from surgery than teetotallers, study reveals (Thanks to Le Petomane, who says "Finally, a study we can believe in.")

THE ESSENTIALS Posted: 02 Jun 2022 07:10 AM PDT Man wanted in Fort Myers for wine and toilet paper theft (Thanks to pharmaross)

NEW YORK HAS OPOSSUMS? Posted: 02 Jun 2022 07:04 AM PDT Woman Is NYC Bar Hero After Calmly Grabbing, Removing Opossum That Wandered Inside (Thanks to Ralph)

WE'RE GUESSING HE'S SINGLE Posted: 02 Jun 2022 06:52 AM PDT I cut 24 traffic cones into small pieces and joined them together to make armor that I could wear. (Thanks to John Lobert)

WE'RE SOLD Posted: 02 Jun 2022 06:51 AM PDT Disconnect from work and let the horses of Iceland reply to your emails while you are on vacation. (Thanks to Duane Carrell)

THIS IS WHY WE ALWAYS STOP AFTER THAT FIFTH LITER Posted: 02 Jun 2022 06:49 AM PDT Benwell arsonist found with cannabis between his buttocks torched property after downing six litres of wine (Thanks to pharmaross)

SOUNDS FESTIVE! Posted: 02 Jun 2022 06:20 AM PDT Vendors needed for Colon celebration (Thanks to pharmaross)

WHAT IS THE DOCTOR DOING IN THEIR SHOWER? Posted: 02 Jun 2022 06:17 AM PDT Doctor warns people to stop peeing in the shower right now (Thanks to pharmaross)

WHY YOUR PIZZA HAS ONLY SEVEN SLICES Posted: 02 Jun 2022 06:16 AM PDT  8 in 10 delivery workers admit to eating a customer's food (Thanks to pharmaross)

LOUISIANA ART UPDATE Posted: 02 Jun 2022 06:11 AM PDT How did a bottle of Tabasco sauce find its way into a painting of the Last Supper? (Thanks to Al Barkafski)

NO MO HOJO Posted: 02 Jun 2022 06:07 AM PDT America's last Howard Johnson's restaurant has closed (Thanks to The Perts)

UPDATE ON WORLDWIDE TOILET-SNAKE EPIDEMIC THAT CONTINUES TO BE IGNORED BY THE SO-CALLED 'MAINSTREAM MEDIA' Posted: 02 Jun 2022 06:04 AM PDT Malaysian Man Gets Bitten by Python on His Buttocks Inside Toilet (Thanks to pharmaross)

WE THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA Posted: 01 Jun 2022 09:20 AM PDT Company to Las Vegas chapels: No more Elvis-themed weddings (Thanks to pharmaross)

DO NOT MESS WITH THEM Posted: 01 Jun 2022 09:14 AM PDT Alabama Woman Drove 'International Commercial Truck' into Mobile Home After Arguing with Boyfriend on Memorial Day: Cops (Thanks to pharmaross)

MEANWHILE IN FLATHEAD COUNTY Posted: 01 Jun 2022 08:52 AM PDT 11:25 a.m. There were concerns about ongoing cannon fire in the neighborhood. (Thanks to pharmaross)

CANADA: A NATION WITH A LOT OF SPARE TIME ON ITS HANDS Posted: 01 Jun 2022 08:47 AM PDT (Thanks to The Perts)

YES, THAT'LL DO IT Posted: 01 Jun 2022 08:45 AM PDT How to Halt STIs Among Seniors? Package Condoms Like Garden Seeds (Thanks to pharmaross)

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